Sometimes it’s easy to tell when someone is an introvert. In large groups, we “quiet ones” can usually be found just listening and observing. We shun small talk and try to speak only when we feel we have something of real value to say. We’re probably not the friend or partner who’ll go to every party with you... Continue Reading →

I can make myself happy. This is the lie of self-sufficiency. This is the lie that happiness is an individual accomplishment. If I can have just one more victory, lose 15 pounds or get better at meditation, then I will be happy. But people looking back on their lives from their deathbeds tell us that happiness... Continue Reading →

The well-known phenomenon of "name dropping," the casual mention of who you know, is part of the ego's strategy of gaining a superior identity in the eyes of others and therefore in its own eyes through association with someone "important." The bane of being famous in this world is that who you are becomes totally... Continue Reading →

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's investigations of "optimal experience" have revealed that what makes an experience genuinely satisfying is a state of consciousness called flow. During flow, people typically experience deep enjoyment, creativity, and a total involvement with life. His studies led him to conclude that happiness is an internal state of being, not an external one. His popular... Continue Reading →

We often don’t realize that we’re suffering from burnout until it’s too late. When we push our creativity and productivity to its limits, we can easily find ourselves teetering on brink of burnout. And there’s a fine line between being in the zone and falling down the slippery slope of mental, emotional and physical exhaustion.... Continue Reading →

Pride is often colored by a self-view of being better than others. In particular in the art and music scene we might judge other people to make us feel better. If we pride ourselves on being fit, we might judge people who are out-of-shape. These judgmental perceptions might gratify us with an air of superiority.... Continue Reading →

We are all storytellers — all engaged, as the anthropologist Mary Catherine Bateson puts it, in an “act of creation” of the “composition of our lives.” Yet unlike most stories we’ve heard, our lives don’t follow a predefined arc. Our identities and experiences are constantly shifting, and storytelling is how we make sense of it. By... Continue Reading →

There are 1.6 million images tagged with #selfcare on Instagram and a few million more on Twitter and Tumblr, most of them posted in 2016. “Self-care” is newer in the American lexicon than “self-reliance,” but both stem from the puritanical values of self-improvement and self-examination. “Self-care” is newer in the American lexicon than “self-reliance,” but both... Continue Reading →

The rise of individualism (with its focus on the self and inner feelings) and decline in social norms that accompanied the modernisation of society means that the community and the family are no longer able to provide the same support for individuals as they once did. And research has shown that being embedded in social networks... Continue Reading →